worthless wordless

i met a girl

another angel of my life

my life

is just as blank as the post

believe it or onot?

是真的无所谓吗？

我真的可以无所谓吗？

每天假装无所谓的样子

真的能让我躲开现实吗？

我是可以真的这样子吗？

我的心魔

又何时能放过我呢？
想透过工作

来逃避所有的这一切

想

认识新的朋友

适应新的环境

可却越是逃避

心魔越是在内心深处

汹涌地沸腾

这样 无所谓吗？

慢慢地

我变成了

我心中魔鬼的傀儡

任它摆布着我的潜意识

近乎残废的心灵

已差不多被心魔占居了

我 还是可以不当一回事

这样 无所谓吗？

无助地眺望着

心魔在搞鬼

a smile

a smile, that would satisfied me.
a laughter, is enough for a tiring day.

I've learned to smile
I've learned to serve
I've learned.

I've shared.
Many things.
from my family to my hobby
and even love.

I've smiled, too.
I started to enjoy the new environment.

I

scare to touch it again.

Self-controlling.

confession of an outrovert

I am here again. Yup. I think you would be probably guessing in front of your desktop, I am gonna emo again, write some bombastic nonsenses. Well, your sixth couldn't be much wrong this time. =p

I am gonna confess to the world, that I hate playboy and those so called flower hearted, as in direct translation from chinese. Yet, ironically, I am one of them. I enjoy being cared, loved and those hidden admiring feeling found deep inside everyone's bottom heart. Slowly, I am turning into what I, myself hate the most. Irresponsible jerked bastard.

I enjoy, most of the social activities. I like mixing up with different group, races, religion, nation of people. I do feel a little proud of myself for being not too shy with stranger, with condition. And that, makes me feel that I have a lot of choice. Most probably the whole thing is caused by my childish. Why would such thought appear in my mind?

I promise myself, not to step into such thing anymore. Not before I could even trust myself. Friends, is what I need the most now. Help me and save me from demonic-evil devil. I am trying to find exit to gateway of light. I couldn't help myself other than just getting myself deeper and deeper into the quicksand. Seriously, I am not o-k-a-y.

So, I guess it's time. For me to confess to my friends and my blog stalkers. I wanna ask, at this point, is that a normal phenomenon or it just simply disastrous to be such kind of person?

I still love 99.99% of myself.
but when it comes to L.O.V.E
I hate the another 0.01% of myself.

Hypo Hydro

Blog while waiting a DotA game to be commenced.

Finally,
My family found out.
It's a big relief. Even though we both have a peace break up. Nothin much. Nothin less.
I guess, it's the right time to do so. Thanks for the memories. Thanks for everything.
I might not be a very perfect boyfriend. But I'm a good friend-to-be, still. =)

For those people who knows the unmasked side of mine, I hope, I could trust everyone of you.
I'm a joker, apparently. I could be very cheerful. I could be nice. I could be just as idiot. Yet I was hoping for supportive words. You guys might think that I am a playboy. Puppy Love as what adults said. I just follow what my heart tells me. So, stop bugging me with those destructive words. I am very kind to tell you so. You could give me any type of advice, but don't you ever drag me from behind. I could do something that is enough for you to suffer if you were using those evil tactics. =)

Buh... Continues DotA. No worries. I am still bangkia.

F.C.U.K

I'm getting more and more fucked up with this fucking fucked life. Please fuck off bloody fuck. Fuck it with all the fucking might to fuck my shitty life. How can I supposed to turn my fucking life back to normal happy life? Fucking holidays makes me feel I'm totally bloody fucking useless bastard. Everything is just so fucked up. Fuck My Life for now.

Cherish life still
Just expressing ma'self

take aim

taking aim
is you
that made me do so

doubt
confusion
worry
wonder
so many many things ran across my mind

I smile
for an instant moment
knowing
I've to pass this test
from God

I will survive...

in the middle of a game...